Over the last month I have come to a realisation that I didn’t know was me- I don’t like fighting. Well no, wait, I knew that- but I just don’t even like confrontation, one bit. I feel funny and while I will speak about something if I am upset, I wait for ages and ages out of fear and build it up in my mind. I have on occasion practiced things, even perhaps minor, to say to the bf, because I imagine what he will say, then I, then it gets worse and worse.
I usually tend to just go quiet, withdraw, and dwell on it by myself.
It works out that we rarely, if ever, fight. Oh there are little snitches, but he doesn’t fight either or like confrontation at all- hence, it just doesn’t happen. He is pretty laidback about all things relationship- doesn’t feel the need to discuss it, as he usually thinks its fine, and im not a big relationship talker either (where are we going, etc etc..yuk). I wonder though, if this is a bad thing? Does it mean that we arenot deep enough with each other? That our relationship is too shallow?
Or does it mean we are just suited because neither of us really wants to tlak about it?
Hmmm, I don’t know. I know communication is important and all, and we DO talk, its just usually most things are fine so there is no need for these big deep and meaningfuls. Are we not open with eachother, or just not the confrontational types?
4 months ago
1 comment:
It's really hard at the time of the 'issue' to talk about stuff when it's scary to risk anger or hurt or all the things we assocaite with confrontation and fighting.
You may be deep, but you may also have chosen not to discuss certian things much of the time. It doesn't mean you can't start occasionally, can't tell him why you would like to...
You can discuss with peace - it doesn't have to be confrontational to have differing ideas or feelings (ideally).
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